Nitmos, The Calf-Cramped Runner

Here’s more holiday cheer I hope you all choke on. My apologies to Robert May.

You know Bowerman, and Rodgers, and
Kelly, and Kastor,
Higdon, and Galloway, and
Radcliffe and Shorter
But do you recall
The most adequate runner of all?

Nitmos, the calf-cramped runner
Had a very decent pace
And if you ever saw him
You would say he’s running a good race

All of the other runners
Would laugh and call him names
They never let poor Nitmos
Join in any cramp free games

Then one muggy marathon eve
Beardsley came to say:
“Nitmos with your calf so tight
Won’t you pace my race next light

Then all the runners loved him
At the start of the race gun blast
Nitmos the calf-cramped runner
Your muscle knots are in the past!

Santa Beardsley (more PhotoShop magic for you all, Merry Christmas!)

Remember it’s holiday cheer week on Feet Meet Street. I’m still detoxing from my Britney level breakdown last week. I’ve taken 2 double espresso Gu packets each morning and cut back on the household chores (what’s less than none?)

Here I try to bring a little levity - some much needed sunshine - to this blog and what do I get? My last happy/joy post generated a number of comments asking why I didn’t physically assault Pluto. What is wrong with you people? He’s a lovable Disney character for chrissakes. And, yes, even I have a soft spot for a smiling, over sized dog. See if I share my sensitive side with you folks again.

Plus, a number of comments seemed to indicate that they expect my Running Nirvana is…countdown to descend into some sort of kitten stomping, llama raping, jail yard level pragian shankfest. I’ll have you know I had every intention of creating a thoughtful, soul searching list. More happy, happy/joy, joy. Since I hate to disappoint, now I’m spending my days searching for words that rhyme with diarrhea and vomit. Your fault, not mine.

And, yes Vanilla, there is a Disney llama character but I did not see him at the races. Lucky for him. I had my llama raping Asics on that day.

I have no excuse for the Fox News article link in the last post that a few of you have pointed out to me. It was sent to me. I used it. I have lashed myself. I will only consider sources from the Bigfoot Gazette and above going forward.

Happy trails.