Silly Old Bear

I used to have a Winnie the Pooh bear stuffed animal when I was a wee lad. I’m not going to lie to you, I snuggled that thing until its little red shirt started to rip and tear. It wasn’t til years later that I came across him again and – noticing the lack of pants now – became slightly uncomfortable and began an intensive re-evaluation of my childhood. Here I had been carrying on a mostly platonic relationship with Winnie the Eunuch all those years while my parents coyly sat by playing Mr. Furley to my Jack Tripper.

The funny thing is, I’m not really a boobPooh guy either. Tigger always seemed the cool one - all hopped up on amphetamines and bouncing around the 100 Acre Woods one glow stick and pacifier short of turning the place into a rave. I even donned a papier mache Tigger head and costume for the local parade one year at the age of twelve (no amphetamines for me though.) My buddy got stuck with the Pooh costume. He thought it was better at the time. Ha, jokes on you, eunuch.

There’s been a lot written about Pooh and friends and their character traits. Some real deep psycho babble stuff trying to correlate each of their personalities to a certain human psychological profile. For the record, I think that kind of stuff is stupid. They’re playful kids book characters for chrissakes. Leave ‘em alone!

No, if anything, they should be compared to runner’s personalities. See, “experts”? You’ve been one upped by a jackass with a blog.

I think we’ve all seen these type of folks at a race:

The Pooh

As written: Silly, very little brains, loves honey, easy going, wants to solve ‘rumblee in tumblee’ crisis.
As a runner: Didn’t train for the race, not exactly sure how far “10k” is in “feet”, forms a human barrier with other Pooh runners preventing anyone from passing, seeks race medal like pot of honey

The Tigger

As written: bouncy, is the "only one”, likes to bounce because that’s what he does best, appears to have a chemical dependency, is a headstrong risk taker.
As a runner: hardcore runner, trains hard and challenges for PR’s, will endanger everyone’s life around them to get what they want, will run until vomiting, is ‘high on life’ (and prescription drugs)

Eeyore

As written: gloomy, has tail detachment issues, thanks you for noticing him, a real negative Nelly, the closest character to the hated llama in the bunch.
As a runner: tries hard but always fears the worst, poor attitude limits training, needs constant encouragement, could run better if stopped making excuses all the time, always runs directly beneath a rain cloud.

Piglet

As written: effeminate, likes balloons
As a runner: effeminate, likes sparkly race medals

Rabbit

As written: very organized, confident, pushy, arrogant, yellow, likes to wear aprons
As a runner: extremely detailed training plan, all the latest technological running gadgets, looks down the nose at the newbie runner, wears aprons

Kanga and Roo

As written: “Now now Roo, you mustn’t do that dear”, “But momma”, a real yin-yang thing going on here, bipolar, dominant-submissive
As a runner: can never decide on a race strategy, goes too fast then too cautious, can never get the balance just right, on Zoloft, nickname may be Master...or The Gimp.

Christopher Robin

As written: friend to everyone, likes birthday parties and yellow shirt wearing, over active imagination probably indicates actual Christopher Robin is in a coma
As a runner: that annoying, over eager runner that bounces around at the start line chatting everyone up but has a closet full of Field Day “participation” awards, nice guy but, dude, we are running a race here, and what’s up with the non-moisture wicking yellow shirt?

Which one are you? A combination of some or all?

I’m probably a bit of a Tigger with some Rabbit thrown in. I like to go all out on race day even it means nudging a slower, Gatorade sipping runner head first into the aid station table (water cups spraying everywhere) with a barely noticeable hip check on my way through. And I’m extremely anal about training schedules and planning. In fact, you could say that my I’m so anal that I’m stitched up tighter than my old stuffed Pooh’s posterior.

And, now that I think about it, maybe I do have a dash of Pooh also. I typically run my races pantless and slathered in honey. There’s nothing more enjoyable than the sound of a bottomless race: Thud slap thud slap.

Don’t assume you know what the ‘thud’ is.

Happy trails and Have A Great Weekend!
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Two mile time trial this weekend! Saturday = 2 x 1600 with 800m recovery between. This should really give me a clue as to 5k readiness. Shooting for 5:45 pace for the 1600's! Sunday = 8-10 mile long run.