Interval Blogging #1

4 x Pop Culture intervals today

Warm-up

Is everybody Michael Jacksoned out yet? I had some thoughts bubble to the surface this weekend and I know you’ve all been waiting for me to weigh in. This is kinda like when Rudy Giuliani appeared on Saturday Night Live after 9/11 and was asked if it was alright to laugh again. Of course it’s alright to laugh again. Otherwise, really, haven’t the cosmetic surgeons won? Here’s a menagerie of pop culture et al intervals. Beware of falling Michael Jackson references.

100 meters

File under: You know you are a runner when…

You walk into your office bathroom and, confronted with the dark yellow, unflushed urine of a co-worker, first think to yourself: Dude needs to hydrate.

400 meters

Moonwalk

With all the round-the-clock Jackson coverage, the one thing neat to see is both of my kids new found fascination with the moonwalk. Talk about a flashback to the 80’s! They are trying to moonwalk all over my smooth kitchen floor. If that’s the one thing they take from Michael Jackson, I can be thankful. I was silently fearing they would want a nose job. Who’s got the money for rhinoplasty these days?

800 meters

Blood Run

Against my will, we watched Twilight this weekend. Before you demand my Man card (and Adult card), know that I attempted to rent a four hour documentary on the History of the Super Bowl* but was overruled.

Bo-ring. What is the fascination with Twilight? Vampires, right? Where was the blood? The pointy fangs? Nothing. Just a bunch of pasty faced, sullen looking folks walking around with a chip on their shoulder. They were more emo than vampire.

At a few different points, they show the vampires racing through the woods at super sonic speed and I found my mind wandering to what it would be like to have that speed for a 5k. And why don’t vampires enter 5k’s if they can run like that? Or maybe they do and go just fast enough to make it look normal? Do they make blood flavored Gatorade? And are the undead technically even eligible for local 5k’s? Should we look into amending the rules?

Back to the movie…where were we? Oh, yeah, another blank faced, non dangerous vampire expressing feelings and not killing anyone. Pass the chips.

1600 meters

The Curious Case of Michael Jackson

Here’s an interesting conundrum: What do you tell your kids about this guy? They’re watching all the coverage, seeing the immense talent on display in the videos and concert footage, and then seeing the reports about his life and trials. And I mean Trials. Why was he on trial? What did he do to those kids? Why was he black and now he’s white? What happened to his nose? The questions go on and on.

Before all of these retrospectives, my kids only knew of the freaky Michael. They had no idea the guy could actually sing and dance like that. In fact, my kids are so young they are only aware of Crazy Britney too. They had no clue that there exists a pre-Freak Michael and a pre-Crazy Britney. O.J. has always been an acquitted murderer. And Star Wars is a big, bloated special effects series starring Jar Jar Binks. The shame.

I’ve found myself answering every one of their questions with a qualifier. Yes, he sure could sing and dance but….Or this video is from when he was normal. This one is before Bubbles the chimp. I bet this video was shot between nose job 7 and 8. Things like that. Viewing these videographies is like watching a man disintegrate before your eyes. And then trying to explain why to your kids.

I find myself feeling guilty for recognizing the man’s talent without pointing out the flaws lest I want to appear to be condoning his behavior. I know not everyone’s perfect – present company excluded - but I don’t want a grandchild named Blanket either. Just sayin’

Cool Down

These blogging intervals went about as well as my actual intervals this weekend. That is too say painful and a real struggle. 2 x 1600 meters with a 800m recovery between. First 1600 @ 5:43, I’ll take that. Second @ 5:59, I won’t take that. Maybe it was the one glove I was wearing that slowed me down. Rhinestone studs aren’t wind contoured.

Now, beat it.

* Some people call it “Steel Magnolias”.