Thursday, May 24, 2012

Broccoli Starburst

There are some days when I’m in the mood for one of my notorious epic length blog posts.  This is not that day.  Here, one thought from the morning, in short form…

My filly can be very insightful when she’s not worrying about how big her nose is compared to the other 4th graders.  (It’s the year of body image for a growing girl.)  She’s consuming some fruit for breakfast this morning and matter-of-factly states, “Everybody likes fruit because it tastes good.  No one likes vegetables.  They don’t have broccoli flavored Starburst.”

True.  Starburst and Skittles both radiate their spectrum of rainbow colors and flavors trumpeting the sugary manufactured “fruitness” of their flavors.  I don’t remember seeing a vegetable in that spectrum.  Could the orange represent carrots?  How about red being a radish?  Dark green is green beans?  And light green is broccoli?  Can a fella get a yellow rutabaga in that rainbow?!?

Let’s face it.  No one “wanted a V8” despite what their commercials said.  It wasn’t until they came out with the V8 Fusion – adding the fruits and hiding the vegetables – that kids suddenly thought, okay, maybe I’ll have a V8 if I can’t get a Slurpee.  Notice how the picture on the bottle really pushes the vegetables….somewhere??

Vegetables are little anti-oxidant and energy powerhouses.  Athletes of all shapes, sizes and seriousness need lots of them.  That’s why I drink cabbage juice regularly.  And it ain’t easy to squeeze juice out of a cabbage.

I don’t subscribe to old axioms like “you are what you eat” because, frankly, I’ve never eaten an asshole yet I’m called that all of the time.  I do eat carrots constantly, which explains my orangish hue.  We need to find some way to package vegetables successfully the same way that fruit has been pushed. 

How about a Skittles garden pack?  Skittles: Taste the Garden.

Someone with more interest, get on that.  My filly is waiting for inspiration.

Happy Memorial Day!

It’s Memorial Weekend here in the U.S.!  You all can enjoy your hot dogs, potato salad, and beer.  We’ll be sitting around the pitch, along with 700 other teams, for the annual *near* end-of-the-year soccer tournament.  Should be nice….only 90 degrees!

Sadly, my colt’s shutout streak came to an end in Ohio in the wet, morning dew grass.  After 4 games – and nearly a 5th – the goalie slipped and fell on a fairly routine shot with 3 minutes to play to let in a goal.  It was Ohio (and it was an open field) so it very well could have been lubricant.  Either way, the shutout ended in a 1-1 tie. No 5th shutout in a row.

Meanwhile, the filly scored one goal and rattled another off the cross bar so hard that, if you listen closely, it is still humming a vibration to this day, in a 6-3 victory.

Rest assured, soccer ends in a few weeks and you'll hear no more about it...for a few weeks after that.


Viper said...

The coach will probably turn his head and let his players trade their tournament trophies for tattoos. That's how we roll in the O-H. Enjoy the weekend. Cheers!

Rain said...

Carrot skittles might be good?

Xenia said...

Rutabagas are called swedes here. Sounds more appetizing, doesn't it?

misszippy said...

Smart 4th grader you have there! Last night after his practice, my 5th grader was warming up a bowl of soup I had made earlier (spinach and white bean). He started to make a salad for himself to go along with it, and then said, "wait, there are enough vegetables in the soup aren't there? I don't need a salad, too." To which I sighed and said yes. They will remain the perpetual lady in waiting to fruit.

Drea said...

Oh you tee'd that one up for me!!!! Go Beets! Skittle flavored beet bites. Bite the Beet! Baby Beet Bar? Beet fries? Beet burger? Beet gumbo? I could get all Bubba Gump here, but seriously- you asked for that one.