Friday, November 20, 2009

Randumbery VIII

I used to run this semi regular feature called "Randumbness" about, as you would guess, various random and dumb things going on. It was a nice page filler. You thought you were getting actual carefully constructed content. Instead, you were getting fluff, filler, time wasters. I'm not saying this to foreshadow this post. I'm just saying the post title is Randumbery and if you can put 2 and 2 together....well, we'll both be pleasantly surprised at your cognitive skills.

Banned On The Run

Now with 96% Less Handsome!

There is a new Banned On The Run podcast. Go there and hear it now. Do that and you can be just like me! (i.e. Bewildered, confused and wondering what the hell happened…followed by feelings of shame and regret. In other words, like a typical Friday evening with Mickey’s malt liquor.) One thing you won’t hear is me. I took my handsome and didn’t phone in with it. I was too busy using my handsome powers to battle global warming.*

Though I’m not there, the other three do a great job of being….present. I’ve always felt their strongest attribute is attendance. Go hear their attendance! I believe the subject of running is even broached haphazardly on one or two occasions. Matt has promised a $20 gift card for the winner of the podcast contest.

Still thrivin’

Like many others, I also received a free thriv shirt in the mail. I had every intention of writing them a nice review. But then I see that every Tom, Dick, and Ian got one and already wrote a review so, really, what’s the point? However, since they gave me a free shirt, I’m going to at least mention them and link to their site. I might even do it twice.

Here’s a nutshell review. Generally, the first quality I look for in a running shirt isn’t bamboo. That’s what I look for as a torture device when presented with the hands and fingernails of prisoners. ** So, trying to sell me on BAMBOO IN YOUR RUNNING SHIRT! wasn’t as eye grabbing as Marketer McAdman probably originally envisioned. My nipples, upon hearing this proclamation, pulled a full turtle and tried to force a concave areola situation.

However, the shirt is soft. Like obscenely soft. Like I’m-pretty-sure-I-committed-a-sin-with-it soft. Mmmm, soft as a….oops, sorry, I prematurely metaphored.

In sum, it was a cool shirt. Comfortable. Nice to run in. My nipples came out of their shell. However, I’m a big time sweater. If I was a huge fat guy, I’d be the type that sweats when I eat. I already sweat eating Sweettarts. The shirt absorbed the sweat but didn’t really wick it away. So, a few minutes into the run, I have a large ole sweat stain in the middle of my chest. No big deal to me but those that like their sweat to fly off onto the pavement – or person – behind you, you may be outta luck.

Well, there, I guess I did review it after all.

Looking Ahead

Future races! No Boston? No problem. Marathons are like opinions.*** There’s no trouble filling up my dance card. The endless possibilities for 2010 are doing the ‘white man weeble’ inside my head. Bayshore Marathon in May? Yes, please. Perhaps this is the year I do the Dances with Dirt 50k? How about a return trip to Chicago, my favorite city, in October? A runner with a blank calendar and a race schedule is a dangerous thing.

If you are a race and desperately want a special appearance from Nitmos, better get your request in now!

Suck it!

Seriously with the vampire movies. They suck. And they don’t suck blood.****

The Refattening

Usually, this is the time of the year when I begin to rebuild my Cheeto Layer. Halloween always kicks off the cold weather refattening. But, oddly enough, I’m actually in peak running shape right now…with no race on the schedule. Go figure. You’d think 45 mini sized Butterfingers in two weeks would add a pound or two…

* It’s working!
** My weekend volunteer work.
*** Which are like assholes.
**** You need this footnote? They suck ass, okay?

20 comments:

RazZDoodle said...

I like how you strategically put "Dick" and "Ian" next to one another. Well played, sir.

Katie A. said...

Wow, two posts in a week! Very impressive! I have to say though, I could have done without the nipple info...just sayin'.:)

Jess said...

Lol at Razz!

Yes a blank calendar and a runner are definitely two very dangerous things when you put them together.

Ian said...

Prematurely Metaphored? I thought that was a RazZDoodle thing.

Roisin said...

Chicago was nice and chilly this year, so your nips might not be pleased, but at least they won't cancel the race!

Lily on the Road said...

An open race calendar...

wow, that's like riding a golden Unicorn (or Llama) to candy mountain...

Running and living said...

Nothing compares to Boston. OK, maybe New York, but that has already happened...

aron said...

i am finding this right now too: "A runner with a blank calendar and a race schedule is a dangerous thing." soooo many options!! chicago is on my radar this year too :) you think we could order weather like they had this year?

Morgan said...

LMAO!

I say go for Chi-town... but then again I'm totally biased.

So excited we actually got two whole posts from you in a weeks time!

Adam said...

96% less handsome? I was thinking 75%, tops.

Melissa said...

Golly. I have read my blogs for awhile and I forgot how much I like reading yours. Even though I don't like running. It's the cheerful insouciance or something...

Danielle said...

I hate you and your 45 mini-butterfingers.

Huh, my captcha was "geekast" - maybe that is blogger's commentary on Banned on the Run?

ShutUpandRun said...

I must be the one loser who did not get the thriv shirt in the mail. But I'm too busy watching those vampire movies to care.

Viper said...

Yes, the refattening is in full effect. And we still have Thanksgiving yet. Cheers to that!

BrianFlash said...

Team Flash is preliminarily planning to hit Chicago next year. But for an earlier race, how about the Trail Mix 50K in April?

I guess that's the difference between popular blogs and my blog - the thriv guy didn't call me...

Spike said...

god bless the refattening.

sRod said...

The fattening is upon me. I like it not.

X-Country2 said...

Butterfinger?! Ew.

KimsRunning said...

I got a thriv shirt too! Haa!!
Hey, come run the Gasparilla Marathon Feb 28, 2010. It's the last full they'll be hosting there and it's a flat, beautiful course. I'll even pace you...you can walk while I kill myself to keep up...lol

M2Marathon said...

LOL premature metaphors...I think I know what freebie you'll be getting in the mail next!