You’ve heard the expression “everyone and their Nitmos” right? Quite literally, I believe EVERYONE has given away a CSN Stores gift certificate at this point. And now your Nitmos has too. Like losing your virginity - or watching The Bounty Hunter – it’s something you do just once.
After intense negotiations, consultation with lawyers, and a luxurious wine-n-dine getaway at a Ft. Wayne, IN spa/Super 8, we settled on the oddball amount of:
That’s right, no cheap $50 gift certificate around these parts. Your loyalty is worth an extra $20 (and apparently so is my self-respect based on the happenings in Ft. Wayne.) That’s $70 to spend at CSN Stores (csnstores.com). A quick perusal of their website – based on their product categories - indicates that you can get Bed & Bath, Lighting, Décor, and Baby & Kids. I have enough baby and kids at my home but, if I were in the market, $70 for a baby is a GREAT price. I doubt Madonna gets them any cheaper. Once you get that baby and/or kids, they might need a place to play. Then head on over and check out the swing sets available here.
I’m not going to burden you with a bunch of “follow mes” and “add my websites” and “tweet me” and “come over and clean my gutters” requirements. If you want the $70, there are two simple rules:
1) Leave a comment.
2) Make sure you use word verification for comments on YOUR blog.
That’s it! What? Oh, right, the word verification thingy. You must use word verification on your blog. You didn’t expect this to be too easy, did you? Remember whose blog this is? I’m going to be a jerk about it too. I’ll use a random number generator to draw the winner. You may enter with a comment time stamped now through Sunday, February 27th at midnight. When the generator…generates a number, I will visit your blog and verify the…verification. No word verification, then it is back into the generator to…generate another number. I will continue to be a jerk as…jerkishly as I want until a winner is found. Hey, if you knew what I had to go through to get that extra $20 for you people*, you wouldn’t complain about the lousy little word verification part of this contest.
I guess – and maybe I’m going soft in the waning days of my thirties – I can let you enter the contest WITHOUT the word verification requirement. If you still want in, but refuse to use word ver, your comment should include a "brief justification for the ontological necessity of modern man's existential dilemma" in exactly NINE words. No more, no less. That’s the price you pay for not using word verification. **
So, get crack-a-lackin’ with a comment! Other times when I have run a contest like this, I’ve gotten no more than 30-35 comments due to my low readership so your odds are pretty good. And I didn’t have the verification requirement for those.
Don’t need $70? Well, you must have a job with a bank, Wall Street, or the health care industry and don’t need such hand-outs (unless they come from the government – ba dum dum). You can leave us commoners to our own private little money grab.
Enter once only. (NOTE: Open to residents of US and Canada.) Good luck!
*One Night in Nitmos. Roger Ebert raves "...much more disgusting and pudding-soaked than One Night in Paris. Comparatively, Hilton's "film" is PG. Abhorrent!"
**At the very least, correctly identify the movie the above quote comes from.
The White Death has returned. Or, at least, I hear people complaining about it. I’ve already mentally started spring so I see nothing more than an accumulation of pollen from the blooming greenery. The pollen is 8 inches deep. I’ve used the occasion to get out my pollen shovel and do some cross-training by making little pollen banks at the sides of my driveway and sidewalks.
I hope I don’t have to Return to War with the Mailman over the pollen blockade in front of my mailbox. As Pooh says, “Oh, bother.”