Wednesday, July 08, 2009

The Bee's Knees

If your reader somehow indicates this was published two days ago, I created this post and time stamped it to detonate Friday morning. If it is screwed up, blame Blogger. I’m away from home and preparing for tomorrow’s 5k. And eating donuts. My folks always have donuts.

I haven’t been very good about announcing blog anniversaries or milestones so, for once, I’m going to recognize one right now: This is post #300! (Queue confetti and balloons.) That’s 300 posts worth of time I could have spent enhancing my career, running, or spending time with my family. I feel sticky (with a side order of depression.)

My previous two century milestones went by without even a murmur of recognition from me or you. Aren’t you people paying attention? Do I have to point it out for you?

- In post #100, I recounted my visit to the doc for, what I was sure was going to be, an anal probing in Paging Dr. Jellyfinger.

- In post #200, I discussed my penchant for awkward elbow running in Akimbo Running.

I’m not one to look back (at least, in this paragraph) so let’s look ahead. I’m in Traverse City right now (don’t rob my house, we have someone staying over and he’s a paroled rapist that describes himself as “having that itch again.” Large fellow too. With herpes.) I have a 5k Saturday morning. How will it go? I don’t know but fate seems to be conspiring against me.

I’m not Calvinistic by nature. Things aren’t pre-ordained. I don’t normally believe things have been pre-arranged to conspire against me but its sure starting to look that way right down to the insects. Specifically, the bees.

Last weekend, my long run left me with a swollen left knee. This happens to me periodically. Forty-eight hours or so of rest, a few bags of ice, things are good to go.

I knocked out some last chance 800’s and was taking my recovery run on the 1.3 mile stretch home. My knee was still a little spongy from the swelling residue but otherwise getting back to normal. I’m about home when a bee decides to make his move. The little prick stings me in the left knee with his, well, pricker. Prick! Why is everyone after my left knee?!? Now I’m itchy and swollen again. Honestly, who fights with a little prick stinger anymore? Evolve already! That’s like throwing stones at a tank. It’s just annoying and it doesn’t do anything (except chip the paint job).

At least, I hope it doesn’t.

I’m looking to set a 5k PR on Saturday. Last time out, I had fruit falling from my anus. It’s the same race again this year but I decided not to make it so dramatic this time. I’ll settle for a tasty pastry. Or a chocolate scone.

If I’m really lucky - and everyone puts their left knee stabbing voodoo dolls away - maybe I’ll break 18 minutes and meet my SOS2 goal. That would really be the bee’s knees.

Happy trails and Have a great weekend!
_________________________________

3x800 final tune-up (with 400m recovery laps): 2:45, 2:46, 2:53.

25 comments:

Marlene said...

GOOD LUCK NITMOS! I'm hoping to channel a fraction of your speedt at my own 5K tomorrow. I'm thinking PRs are in order for both of us!

Go get it!

Spike said...

Enjoy TC only to the extent that you have a great race and your wife, children, and parents are there to worship, I mean cheer, you.

Kristina said...

Feeling twilight zoney; just blogged about bees and excretory functioning. Good luck in the 5k. I'm thinking some anal retention might actually help your time.

sneakersister said...

Good luck! Break a shoelace!

Ace said...

No Calvinism? Are you sure? Isn't it clear by now that the following are inevitable?
1. all evenly rounded 100 level posts will cover some form of anatomical invasion and/or suffering
2. Vanilla will soon be deported back to England
3. the SOS2 goal will fall

Nothing really to worry about me thinks...

Jamoosh said...

I shall opt to forego my run tomorrow to so that additional cosmic energy will be available for you to draw upon in your quest of a PR.

sRod said...

Congrats and good luck!

You know, I never did understand the cherries/anus thing. It seemed too disturbing to actually reread it.

RazZDoodle said...

good luck!

Marathon Maritza said...

Good luck!!! You better kick ass or else!

(You don't wanna know what the 'or else' is...trust me.)

John at Hella Sound said...

I applaud you for not opening the post with "SPAARRRRRTANNS!!"--a dated reference to the movie 300. Like I just did.

Congrats on your 300th post, as well as your success in maintaining your relationship with your herpes-plagued parolee friend. They say that the road (or prison) ain't no place to start a family, but somehow you've made it work.

(And a sincere "good luck" on your 5k!)

Irish Cream said...

Good luck Nitmos! And happy 300th birthday--er, I mean, post! :)

Beth said...

Good luck at the race!. Try not to think about how itchy your knee is going to bee... I mean be... Are the kids running? You should beat them as many times as you can before they start pounding you into the ground.

cath said...

good luck! Im very impressed with your running times...I wanna run like you when I'm grown-up..(says the errr...older woman..)

theloosemoose said...

Don't be too alarmed, but I've used my cyber stalking skills to...um..stalk you, I guess you'd have to say. Yeah - definitely "stalk". There's just no other word for it. And it appears that either I suck at this whole stalking shit OR you just delivered an 18:22. NICE JOB!!! I can not even imagine running ONE 6:00 mile, let alone a few of them in a row. I predict an 18:00 by summer's end.

theloosemoose said...

And let's just keep the stalking between us, shall we? My probation officer gets SO uptight about this kinda thing.

Robin said...

Hope you did well today - looking forward to your race report!

joyRuN said...

Happy 300th post!

If you do good on your 5k this weekend, you can have your man card back from watching Twilight.

Maybe :)

AKA Alice said...

Nooooooooooooo...I just got the fruit from anus visual out of my head and now it's back...noooooooooooo!

Velma said...

Happy 300th. I hope you enjoyed some Huey Lewis on the way up North. Did you stick around and get your award this year?

Vava said...

I'd like to wish you luck, but I am so late to comment that I already know your result! (Thanks for the hyperlink to the race site.) Looks like it went well - congrats! Looking forward to the report, pastries and all...

Lisa Slow-n-Steady said...

Hope the race went well.

Marlene said...

I got my PR! Did you get yours?!

Adam said...

As usual I'm a bit slow. Hopefully you were not as slow and hit that sub 18:00. That would have to put you near the top of most races, right?

Jessica said...

Good luck Nitmos! Hope it went well-okay, that doesn't even make sense, but you know what I mean!

X-Country2 said...

Can't wait to read the report. (The race AND the donuts.)